I CAN MOONWALK!
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
