I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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