I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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