I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
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