I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize