dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
