My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
