I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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