Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
