My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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