i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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