I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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