So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Randomize
