well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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