No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
