Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
