Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Welp...herpes.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
