The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
