whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
