Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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