you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
