I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
