Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Randomize
