I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
