His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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