I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
