Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
We had sex on a dog bed..
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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