the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
