I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
And the cops told us we were all naked.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
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