I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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