did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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