So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
