I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??