when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.