So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Randomize
