i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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