If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
