we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I think pants incapable of making pants work
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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