The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
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I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
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Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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