is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
