I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
