I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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