ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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