So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
