So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
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We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
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Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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