I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
