I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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