Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He? As in you personified your dick?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
