i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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