I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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