Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Randomize
