bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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