Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize